Despite being a recent college graduate with no job, I can’t really say that I’m unemployed. While I’m not currently receiving any sort of compensation, the daily job search is a fulltime job in and of itself. I have a couple dozen sites that I routinely check for new job postings to go along with the hours I spend perusing the Internet for companies in various fields that I’m interested in. Most of the job posting have me submit my meager resume and often a cover letter but every once and while I’ll come across a posting that has me answer specific questions. The questions are often of the mundane variety, asking where I see myself in X amount of years or what do I know about the company. The other day I came across a job posting that a few simple, yet thought provoking questions. Five and half hours and a lot of introspection later, I finished answering the questions. Here are the questions, answers and my thought process through it all.
Simple question to answer, right? Wrong. Dead Fucking Wrong. Do they want my full name? They're also asking for my resume so my name's already on there, maybe they want me to say something clever. Perhaps a nickname? I don't have a nickname. Should I make up a nickname? What if they find out I don't actually have a nickname, will they automatically disqualify me for consideration? Why hasn't anyone given me a nickname?
Fuck it, I'll just go with this.
2. Position to which you’re applying
Copywriter Intern (which I’m not qualified for)
I mean, I do watch a lot of Mad Men so I have that going for me.
3. Cat person, dog person, or neither (please include a brief explanation of why)
Ok, so this is where the questions really got me thinking. I grew up with both cats and dogs so this is a difficult question. There are aspects of both animals that I like and don’t like, and it also depends a lot on the type of cat/dog. I like the cleanliness of cats; they shit in boxes, can take car of themselves for the most part and don’t smell. On the other hand, they can be cold and distant, fur up your clothes and knock shit of your bathroom counters for no other reason than their desire to show dominance over thier hairless, bi-pedal overloads. Come to think of it, that's actually a pretty good reason. Dogs are loyal, can be fun to play with outside and can do fancy tricks like licking their butts and then licking your face. They also shit and piss everywhere, get slobber all over the place and need lots of attention.
The truth of the matter is that I’m probably more of a cat person (cleanliness wins me over), but I know that I would never escape the tell tale beating hearts of my deceased pets if I picked one over the other. Potential guilt was the strongest influence when I copped out and said, “This is a loaded question. I grew up with cats and dogs so I would feel too guilty if I picked one over the other.”
I hate this cartoon but it fits so here it is
4. All-time top 5 favorite songs
Have you ever tried to select your top 5 favorite songs? If not, don’t try it unless you have half a day to kill. This is probably the most difficult question I’ve ever been asked. I like music. I listen to it when I’m in the shower, playing videogames, working, napping, eating, masturbating, driving, Interneting, sleeping, etc. It took me over 2 hours to compile a list of 230+ songs and whittled it down to just five. The list of 230 isn’t songs I really like because if it was, it would probably balloon somewhere around 700, it is truly a list of my favorite songs and it’s comprised of only song I have in my library. The truth of the matter is that you wouldn’t get much of an argument from me if you were to select any five songs off the list and say they were my favorite of all time. Anyway, I went through the list of 230+ and picked the ones I couldn’t live without, and that ended up shrinking the list to 62. From the 62, I somehow managed to get it to around a dozen and then eventually five. Continue reading “5 Questions On A Job Application That Took Me All Day To Answer” »
Another installment of New on Netflix Instant Streaming. Click the link to see them all or check out all of our Netflix postsincluding New on Netflix Instant Streaming, Lists, Reviews and more!
Please note these are not new to Netflix Instant today but merely in the past month or so.
Director: Mel Brooks (The Producers, Blazing Saddles)
Starring: Mel Brooks, John Candy (Uncle Buck, Cool Runnings), Bill Pullman (Independence Day, Casper), Rick Moranis (Currently serving 2 years for child endangerment)
Genre: Comedy, Parody
Why You Should Watch It: Always on the list for top parody movies of all time, Spaceballs brings the funny to a trilogy that needed the funny. That may be a lie, both parts, but it was the first Start Wars movie parody, setting up current spoofs from the likes of Robot Chicken and Family Guy. Where would Seth Green and Seth MacFarlane be today without Mel Brooks paving the way into the future of creating Star Wars material that people actually want to watch? Creating Star Trek parodies, that’s where…*shivers*
The Dirty Dozen (1967)
Director: Robert Aldrich (The Longest Yard)
Starring: Lee Marvin, Ernest Borgnine, Chrales Bronson, John Cassavetes
Genre: Action, Drama, Comedy
Why You Should Watch It: The Dirty Dozen follows 12 convicted felons who are summoned to serve in an experimental WW2 platoon to carry out a specific mission involving killing German generals. There is drama, there are laughs, there are action scenes, shit blows up, and people get killed. You never thought you could enjoy a 1967 film so much, until you realize The Graduate and Cool Hand Luke came out the same year.
Lethal Weapon 1 & 2 (1987, 1989)
Director: Richard Donner (The Omen, Superman)
Starring: Mel Gibson (Homophobic, Anti-Semitic, Misogynist), Danny Glover, Gary Busey (1), Joe Pesci (2)
Genre: Action, Inter-racial Buddy Cop Films
Why You Should Watch It: Honestly, I haven’t seen either of these movies fully, but from the bits I do recall seeing it was a fun action cop drama with some dry humor. I have heeded my own advice and added them to the ever growing list, “Shit to watch on Netflix Instant”. If you enjoy other Inter-racial buddy cop films such as Beverly Hills Cops 1-7, these two films are right up your alley. They made a total of four of these, so they can’t be too terrible, right?
Director: Rob Cohen (The Fast and the Furious)
Starring: Vin Diesel, Asia Argento (Foreign Films), Samuel L. Jackson (“Hold on to your butts”)
Genre: Mindless Action
Why You Should Watch It: I can’t in good conscious actually recommend this film unless you have no interest in thinking, you like seeing things blow up, enjoy salivating over dude sweat or get excited over glimpses of attractive females. It could be a good background movie, or a good way to start the night out with a fun drinking game. How about, every time Vin Diesel says something, awesome? Get ready for fun.
Director: Danny Boyle (28 Days Late, Slumdog Millionaire)
Starring: Ewan McGregor (Star Wars I-III, Moulin Rouge!), Ewen Bremner, Jonny Lee Miller (Hackers), Kevin McKidd (Grey’s Anatomy)
Genre: Crime, Drama, Drugs
Why You Should Watch It: Academy Award Nomination. British Academy Film Award Nominations and won Best Screenplay. Ranked 10th in the Brithish Film Institues top 100 British Films. A cult classic. Ewan McGregor. Ranked 7th best motion picture soundtrack in history by Vanity Fair. A great depiction of the depressing highs and lows of heroin addiction. The list goes on. Just watch the damn movie already.
Bonus Television Show-
Mad Men (2007-Season 5 coming 2012)
Creator: Matthew Weiner
Starring: Jon Hamm, Elisabeth Moss (The West Wing), Vincent Kartheriser (Angel)
Why You Should Watch It: This swell time piece has won thirteen Primetime Emmys, and four Golden Globes, among countless nominations in its short 4 year running. I just started catching up on these and I can assure you, you won’t be disappointed. It has been known to cause depression in those who are not able to drink while on the job, so be careful out there folks.